I met Drake when I was 13. I don't recall how we met - very likely at the ranch although I have no specific memory of him riding horses. We didn't go to the same school nor did we live in the same neighborhood but for me at least it was love straight out of the gate. I don't even recall breaking up with Roland but we must have or maybe I did to be with Drake. In any case we had THE most fun and he was SUCH a generous lover (I was sexualized at a very young age so that it is not very unusual that I would be interested in that part of me being loved instead of abused). I lost my virginity more technically to him not Mr Darning at age 14. That was kinda funny in that right afterwards (but not before LOL) I worried about pregnancy and he gave me one of his sisters' douches (which if I had had a proper education I would have known you use it before not after sex if you're looking to avoid pregnancy and I didn't know how to use it and ended up a mess calling for Drake's help which he was kind enough to not laugh at me as he was at least somewhat more experienced than I and maybe even by a long shot - we never discussed his prior sex life that I recall). He seemed anyway to know what he was doing and I fully trusted him - we had been together a year before we decided to "go there". But after that I became uncaring if I got pregnant and we had sex regularly without any kind of birth control.
His family was a good bit different than mine in that he was allowed to do just about anything he wished without so much as asking or even informing his parents as to what he was up to. One time when we were about 16 we went camping the good old fashioned way meaning no toilets no water no premade up camp ground but rather we hiked in water and supplies deep into the Sakoia Mountains where the trees are humongous and it was absolutely beautiful and we only saw one other couple the entire week we were there. We spent a lot of time at this one area in the river where the rocks were smooth from having water constantly running over them and we slid on them like slides at a pool and there were also these mini whirl pools where the water had dug into the rock deep and made holes that caused the water to swirl around them and was so much fun being twirled around while standing in them - we did a lot of it nude LOL. Funny Drake like any boy/man felt it his duty to care for my safety and he brought a 38 in case of bears was his excuse but we saw no bears while there or if we did I don't recall it - he didn't even use the gun so we were never in any real danger. Well except there were signs all over saying do not feed the squirrels as they carried the plague of all things (I wonder if they still do).
It was all a big adventure and just lovely sitting at night by the fire eating and watching the stars and making love under them. One of the best times of my life. He was kind and intelligent and funny and cute and just rocked my world. And so the years went by - at first he would ride a dirt bike the 7 miles to my house to see me every single day impressing my whole family. Even my dad who could be a serious ass when he wished to be finally fell in love with Drake as did my sis and my mom. He later spent much time staying the night in the guest room (which of course we used copiously LOL). He was a fabulous break dancer. He could jump right over me standing up straight. We went to every dance my school held which were quite a lot and I still have the photos where you can see the clothes styles and hair styles evolving throughout the years. At one point I had a hair cut that made me look very like Princess Diana. We made great use of the car my parents gave me which was kinda crushing in that my Papa had promised me a cherry red Camaro that he showed me and was spotless but he rode it around and despite putting concrete in the trunk he said the car was still too front heavy for a girl to drive (grrrrr lol) instead I ended with an old light blue 4 door cadillac my parents had had about enough of. Even before I got the car we would regularly make trips via bus to magic mountain just to dance and to disneyland and the beach and all over my parents never saying much about it. I got good grades so they largely stayed out of my way but my mother either didn't care or was blind to my antics as I spent little time in school after I switched from private to public and now had a car - instead I went to the beach about 3 days a week to work on a tan. I didn't even try to hide the sand or bathing suits and was never questioned as to when I found time to go to the beach so often. The ironic thing is I remember being angry that they were so strict - I guess I didn't know the meaning of the word LOL. The one time I was truly very harshly punished (no phone calls no visiting friends no horseback riding no tv - all I was allowed to do is study and listen to music and swim for 6 weeks!!) is when I purposely failed a history class at the Catholic school (I had been pushing hard for over a year to be moved to public school - the kids at the Catholic school were stuck up and made fun of kids that didn't come from more money. My family was a comfortable upper middle class so I didn't get picked on but I stood up for one boy who got bullied pretty badly simply for being there on a scholarship. Also they would do drugs and argue who came from the richest family - they just made me ill and I wanted out badly to be with kids who were more regular (turns out there ain't no such thing - at the public school kids got bullied too just for different reasons.) I'll come back to Drake soon.
When I was 16 a girlfriend of mine and I were cleaning the house of her father's friend who had just bought it and it was a dusty mess. Well first off I am bi and so was she and we were both fairly good looking and we just weren't careful or wise enough to know how dangerous was that situation what with the man continually giving us margaritas while we worked and then insisting we join him in the hot tub when we were done. She and I were showing off flirting with each other and we DID know that was attractive even if we didn't know that it would go as sour as it did. It was bad judgment in league with a bad man that got me hurt. I got out of the hot tub cuz now I was woozy with booze and the heat and excused myself to go change. I went and got my stuff and went in the bathroom and stupidly didn't lock the door. He walks in while my bikini top was off and starts groping and kissing me - I still wasn't terribly worried and figured he was just drunk (bad habit of mine to this day is making excuses for others' bad behavior) and so I gently pushed him away explaining that I had a boyfriend but he had put his leg behind mine and he pushed me. Unable to back up I simply landed hard and fast on my back on the floor and then he was all power and I was all out of any kind of control of the situation. He ripped off my bottoms and forced my legs apart (which is surprisingly painful) and raped me. I guess I had been screaming because Carine was banging at the door claiming she was going to call the cops but she only called my mom, explained we had too much to drink and could she please come pick us up.
Well and now is the truly odd part - my mind made a sort of flip like the turning on of a light and I got on top of him and had sex with him until he was finished. Several minutes later we were all in the kitchen and Carine was crying. I was out to lunch and banging my head against the wall. He started to freak a bit as I think he finally realized he had created quite a mess that he could get into a lot of hot water over. His cure for the problem was to give me cocaine. I had never had any before and despite him telling me how to do it I blew out instead of sucking in air through my nose and sent a bunch flying. He repeated the instructions, made another line and the second attempt was successful and it actually worked. I went from silent almost to the point of catatonic to talking my head off about anything and everything and cheerful and no longer in pain. The next day Carine was crying hysterically in my car apologizing over and over again and I said she was being ridiculous as I had NOT been raped. She argued with me very hard and much that indeed I had been but my memory was completely wiped of everything that happened in that bathroom save me on top of him and us merely having sex (as if 16 yr old girls normally have sex with 40 something year old men we don't know - OR that I would EVER cheat on Drake my mind seemed to have no issue with the contradictions there but truly I only remembered having sex and I didn't recover the memory for 11 yrs where when this stupid guy I was dating insisted I list all the men I had had sex with and when I got to him my mind just opened up like a tsunami and all the info came forth all at once. I was so bowled over by the fact that I could have forgotten that and for so long that I didn't have any emotion attached to the information like as if it happened to someone else. I was stunned and here was this arse calling me a liar and that I couldn't have been raped. I just laughed at the absurdity of the entire situation and didn't talk to him anymore on the subject but went silent. I wasn't traumatized by the new info but I would hazard to guess that I had been traumatized rather badly by the event and the whole getting through it my mind went through subconsciously without my help.
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